Encore

This is Susan Boyle singing "Cry Me a River" on a charity CD made in 1999. Apparently, only 1000 copies were made of this CD. (Oh, to own one of those...) There is no video -- just stills from her performance on Britain's Got Talent -- but the audio is fantastic. Enjoy, fellow audiophiles.

Susan

Susan Boyle.

If you don't know that name, let me introduce you to her HERE.

I love that this video starts out with Susan Boyle sitting on a chair, eating a sandwich. Many great things start with a sandwich. Never underestimate the power of a good sandwich.

I loved her little smile right before she started singing. She knew, from the snickering and laughing going on, that everyone had very low expectations of her, but she also knew that she was going to blow her audience away the second she started singing. That smile showed her confidence.

I love how stunned the audience and judges were, and how she won them over with just a few notes.

I love that she made Simon smile. It was like the sun came out.

I wonder how she could even hear herself sing over the cheering.

And yes, watching her performance made me cry.

This video made my day.

Easter

Four years ago, I was in the throes of pregnancy and morning sickness. On the day after Easter, I was not feeling well enough to plan a lesson for our Family Home Evening, so I pulled out the Lamb of God DVD for us to watch. (This is a short film that depicts the last week of the Savior's life.) I figured we could watch it and then discuss Christ's atonement and resurrection.

I had no idea how much that film would impact Parker and Jack, who were 8 1/2 and 5 at the time. They had so many questions -- questions about Judas, questions about Pilate, questions about the Roman soldiers, questions about why "the bad guys were doing those mean things to Jesus." Certain parts of the film were difficult to watch. I explained to Parker and Jack that because Jesus was the Son of God, He could have stopped the people from hurting Him at any time. He could have called down legions of angels from His Father to stop those things from happening, but He didn't (Matthew 26:53). He willingly laid down His life as a sacrifice for sin. The boys expressed amazement that Jesus allowed others to beat Him and nail Him to a cross when He had the power to stop them.

The Friday morning after we watched that DVD, Jack came into my bedroom. (I hadn't gotten out of bed yet that morning -- morning sickness had gotten the best of me.) He said, "Mom, I've been thinking about it a lot, and I think I know why Jesus let the bad guys hurt Him." I realized that he had been thinking about this for three days, so I was curious to hear what conclusions he had drawn. I asked, "Well, why do you think Jesus let the 'bad guys' hurt Him?" His answer: "Because Jesus loved the bad guys."

My then five-year-old son taught me a sermon with that short sentence.

I think that each of us, at times, feels like a "bad guy." How grateful I am that I have a Savior who loves me and who, if I turn to Him, will save me from myself.

Isaiah Chapter 53
4 ¶ Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.
5 But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.

Happy Easter.

Atonement

Every April and October, members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints are instructed by General Authorities of the Church at a General Conference. The April conference was held last weekend, and I would like to share an excerpt from my favorite talk of the conference. This talk was given by Elder Jeffrey R. Holland of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, and it brought me a great deal of comfort.



You may listen to the talk in its entirety HERE.

I would like, also, to share the text of my favorite Easter hymn:

O Savior, thou who wearest
A crown of piercing thorn,
The pain thou meekly bearest,
Weigh'd down by grief and scorn.
The soldiers mock and flail thee;
For drink they give thee gall;
Upon the cross they nail thee
To die, O King of all.

No creature is so lowly,
No sinner so depraved,
But feels thy presence holy
And thru thy love is saved.
Tho craven friends betray thee,
They feel thy love's embrace;
The very foes who slay thee
Have access to thy grace.

Thy sacrifice transcended
The mortal law's demand;
Thy mercy is extended
To ev'ry time and land.
No more can Satan harm us,
Tho long the fight may be,
Nor fear of death alarm us;
We live, O Lord, thru thee.

What praises can we offer
To thank thee, Lord most high?
In our place thou didst suffer;
In our place thou didst die,
By heaven's plan appointed,
To ransom us, our King.
O Jesus, the anointed,
To thee our love we bring!

(Hymn 197, "O Savior, Thou Who Wearest a Crown," Hymns of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints)

I wish you all a joyous Easter!

Conversation

Luke: Mommy, are you a droid?
Me: No, Luke, I'm not a droid! I'm your mommy.
Luke: No, Mommy, you are a droid. You are a bad guy!

That kid watches way too much Star Wars.

Parker

Parker was invited to go to the beach with his friend, AJ, for Spring Break. AJ's mom (my friend, Amanda) took the boys for surf lessons.



Parker, too cool for school.

Parker, headed to shore.

Seriously, how did he learn to surf so fast?

Parker and AJ.

Boys with their boards.

I think my kid looks cool surfing. I am going to take surf lessons this summer, but I'm not sure that I'll look as cool on a surfboard as Parker does. I might be a surf spaz, but I'm going to try anyway.

Dream

Roger, Emily, Sheldon, and Thomas

31 October 2008

I had a dream about 7 1/2 years ago that I have never forgotten. It was not a good dream at all, but I hesitate to call it a nightmare, in spite of the fact that I woke up in a sweat, crying, with my heart racing.

I dreamed that there was a fire in the hills near our home, and that Jack was badly burned in this fire. At the hospital, I was told that he had third-degree burns over 80% of his body. I began sobbing, and then I began praying. I pleaded with Heavenly Father to somehow heal Jack. I begged Him to not make Jack go through the years of surgeries and therapy that I knew he would require in order to recover. "Please, please don't make Jack go through this. You can heal him. Please heal him," I prayed.

And then I heard a voice answer me, saying, "Why would you have Me deny him this opportunity for growth?" Those words echoed in my head as I woke up. I don't know that I have ever been happier to wake up from a dream in my life. It was one of those dreams that felt so real, it didn't seem like a dream, and it took me a few minutes to realize that none of it had actually happened. Jack was asleep in his bedroom, and he was healthy and unburned.

I've thought about that dream so many times over the last few years, mainly during times when I've watched loved ones passing through extremely difficult trials. I've had loved ones endure significant loss, and I've watched their hearts break. I've watched friends and family members lose their parents, their teenagers, their infants, their marriages, etc. I've wished I could somehow take away their pain, and then I would remember that voice in my dream saying, "Why would you have Me deny him/her this opportunity for growth?" I suppose that the dream gave me a different outlook on suffering. I now view trials as opportunities for growth that our Heavenly Father allows us to have -- opportunities that He won't deny us -- because He loves us.

Most recently, the loved ones whom I have watched suffer are my little sister, Emily, and her husband, Roger. Emily got pregnant last summer with twin boys, and it was such an exciting, happy time for our whole family. I read her blog often during that time to get the updates and see pictures of the ultrasounds.

On October 31st of last year, as I was readying my home for Jack's little Halloween party, I got a call from my mom. It appeared that Emily, who was only 23 weeks along in the pregnancy, was going into labor. The doctors were hoping to stop the labor from progressing. I prayed on and off that morning as I cleaned my home and set up for the party. About 30 minutes before all of Jack's friends would be getting off the school bus at my house, my mom called again. Emily had given birth to the twins, they had lived a short time, and then they had died. (The firstborn twin, Sheldon, lived for 10 minutes. The second, Thomas, lived for 25 minutes.)

Those little boys were not my own, but I have grieved their loss. I have grieved, also, for Emily and Roger. I cannot even begin to understand what it is like to lose a child. (Sadly, my brother, Nathan, and his wife, Diana, also lost a child. Diana carried a beautiful baby boy, Elijah, full-term. He was, however, stillborn in April 2006.)

March 4th and 5th of last week were the due dates for Sheldon and Thomas. (Yes, twins can have their own due dates.) Last week was difficult. The due dates came and went. Saturday morning, I woke up at about 4 am and could not get back to sleep. I don't know what I had been dreaming about, but my first thoughts upon awakening were of the twins, the little boys we'll never know in this life.

I wish that my sister hadn't lost her twin boys. I wish that my brother hadn't lost his son. However, I have seen that as my siblings have turned to their Heavenly Father, these losses and experiences have provided them with opportunities for growth. I know that, ultimately, these experiences have helped them become some of the most remarkable people I know. I am so proud of them for the way they've handled their trials with grace and faith. What good examples they have been for me.

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Revelation 21:4 And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.

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Romans 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

Anyway, these are just some thoughts that I've been having this week, and I felt the need to write them down.